Hi brianbelew,
Welcome to Apple Support Communities. We understand that you're having an issue with Screen Time on your child's device. We'd like to help.
You mentioned that both devices are up to date. Just to confirm, they are both running iOS/iPadOS 16.2, correct? We just want to rule out that either device is running an older version or a beta version of the software.
Then, let's have you check out these steps to make sure Screen Time is set up correctly:
Set downtime and app limits on a family member’s device
1. On your family member’s device, go to Settings 
> Screen Time.
2. Tap Turn On Screen Time, tap Continue, then tap This is My Child’s iPad.
3. To schedule downtime for your family member (time away from the screen), enter the start and end times, then tap Set Downtime.
4. To set limits for categories of apps you want to manage (for example, Games or Social Networking), select the categories.
5. To see all the categories, tap Show All Categories.
6. Tap Set, enter an amount of time, then tap Set App Limit.
7. Tap Continue, then enter a Screen Time passcode for managing your family member’s Screen Time settings.
Note: You can also turn on downtime on demand for a family member, either directly on their device, or through Family Sharing on your device (if you’ve set up Family Sharing).
If your child requests more screen time, you can approve or decline the request in Settings > Screen Time or in Messages.
Set up Screen Time for a family member on iPad - Apple Support
Keep us updated on how this goes.
Cheers!
