Hey there, NurseK19,
Thanks so much for using Apple Support Communities.
This definitely doesn't sound like expected behavior, but we're happy to help. Updating your iPhone shouldn't affect the Screen Time settings at all. Have you double checked that your Screen Time passcode is secure, to rule out anyone mistakenly changing settings for that feature? Here is how you can change that password, simply as an isolating step: If you forgot your Screen Time passcode - Apple Support. We know you didn't forget the password, but the info there should still be helpful.
If the issue continues to occur after changing that password, then it may be a good idea to disable Screen Time entirely and then re-enable it from scratch. This can help refresh settings and ensure that everything is set up in the best way possible.
We hope this does the trick for you!
Cheers.