Hello Sailormoonbristol,
If your headphones aren't working properly during calls, try out these related steps to solve it: If your headphones don't work with your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch
If your headphones don't work with your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch
Get help when you can’t hear sound from your headphones, the sound is muffled, or your microphone doesn't work.
Check for debris, damage, or loose connections
1. Check for debris in the headphone port on your iPhone, iPad or iPod touch.
2. Check your headphone cable, connector, remote, and earbuds for damage, like wear or breakage.
3. Look for debris on the meshes in each earbud. To remove debris, gently brush all openings with a small, soft-bristled brush that's clean and dry.
4. Firmly plug your headphones back in. If your iOS device has a case, remove the case to get a firm connection.
If your headphones still aren't working, follow the steps below for your issue.

If you can't hear any sound or if only one side of your headphones works
1. Adjust the volume with the volume buttons on your iOS device or use the Volume slider in Control Center on your iPhone or iPad.
2. To see if you need a replacement, try a second pair of headphones. If the second pair works, contact the manufacturer of the initial pair and ask if you need a replacement. If the second pair doesn't work, contact Apple Support.

If your microphone doesn't work
1. Make sure that your headphones have a built-in microphone.
2. Check your microphone for blockage, like debris, lint, or plastic packaging.
3. To see if you need a replacement, try a second pair of headphones. If the second pair works, contact the manufacturer of the initial pair and ask if you need a replacement. If the second pair doesn't work, contact Apple Support.

Still need help?
If your headphones still aren't working, contact Apple Support.
You can test another Lightning to 3.5 mm Headphone Jack Adapter or test another pair of headphones with the adapter and iPhone to further isolate the issue.
Did you purchase this Lightning to 3.5 mm Headphone Jack Adapter through Apple or a Reseller? If the issue is with the adapter and you've recently purchased it through Apple directly (within the last 14 days), then you could contact them about the issue: Official - Apple Support
If you continue to have issues despite the steps above and music audio works fine through the headphones, then we'd recommend to contact Apple Support directly: Official - Apple Support They'll need to take it from here.
Wishing you well, take care.