My new 9th gen IPAD find my device app will not pair with my new Iphone 14. So I am unable to locate the phone with my IPAD - they won't pair in bluetooth. Ideas?

An iPhone and iPad are not Bluetooth paired for any use of Find My and they cannot be paired.

If both the iPhone and the iPad are using the same Apple ID for iCloud and if Find My is turned on in both devices, then they should be locatable using Find My one either device. Also see: Use the Find My app to locate a missing device or item - Apple Support

Also: An iPhone will not pair via Bluetooth to a computer (Mac or Windows) or an iPad except for personal hotspot and then only if your cellular plan supports it. See the following for more information:  Bluetooth: Why can't I pair my iPhone or … - Apple Community

If you are attempting to use Handoff/Continuity or AirDrop, that does involve Bluetooth but the devices are NOT paired; Bluetooth just needs to be on and the devices in range of each other. The following may help with Handoff/Continuity issues: Use Continuity to connect your Mac, iPhone, iPad, and Apple Watch - Apple Support

Also see Share files between your Mac and Bluetooth devices - Apple Support