iTunes
How can I download iTunes so I can reset my phone? It is disabled
iPhone XS
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You need to use a Windows computer with iTunes or use any Mac computer.
If you have a Windows computer that doesn't have iTunes, see: Download and use iTunes for Windows - Apple Support
Also see the following from If you forgot your iPhone passcode - Apple Support
This process requires a Mac or PC. If you're using a PC, make sure that it has Windows 8 or later, and that iTunes is installed. You also need the cable that came with your iPhone, or another compatible cable, to connect your iPhone to the computer.
If you don't have a computer and you can't borrow one, you need to go to an Apple Retail Store or Apple Authorized Service Provider for help.