iPhone 11 (ios 18.5) won't connect to iTunes (12.13.7.1) to download songs

I'm about to swan dive over the edge with frustration. I am a Windows user (but that may change soon). I just want to be able to copy songs from the playlists I've made and have them available on my phone. I've tried everything I've been able to read about, updating systems, clean installs, driver updates, different cables, etc. I deleted regular iTunes since I have Apple Devices on my desktop, and used the stand-alone installer for iTunes. I simply don't know what to try next. I REALLY want my music when I go in the hospital next week for surgery. Am I missing something obvious here??? Thanks in advance for whatever help you can give me.