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my ex has all of my kids in his family with him as the organizer. he has all access and all control. he will occasionally block me from messaging or tracking etc. i can't approve apps, help them trouble shoot etc etc.
I also worry about my own privacy when they leave my house (wifi) and go to his.
I can't believe apple has no solution for 2 households.
any help out there???
That would be a suggestion to make to Apple (the people on this forum are just users like yourself, not Apple). Click on this link for Apple products feedback links --> Product Feedback - Apple
Apple may not respond but your comment will be read.
My only other idea is a more complicated and costly but that would be to set up a different user account to only use in this Family Sharing group and join with that one and use the other independently. This would require buying a second mobile device unless you have a computer.
Ultimately though it likely comes down to you and your ex coming to an amicable arrangement as regards to the Family Sharing arrangements. I could see that setting up joint Organizer status capability would be horribly complicated and open to all kinds of abuse. I would not wait for Apple to arrive at a solution. I suspect that everything involving the Family Sharing situation involves not only Apple but all the app developers and media companies too.
Unfortunately, having membership in two separate Family Sharing plans doesn't seem to fix most of the problems you're reporting here. Kids can still share Wi-Fi credentials and passwords, and approvals are still going to be specific within a Family Sharing plan.
You can secure your Wi-Fi somewhat better by loading and using a profile on the kids' devices, if you have a Mac to create that. Other available profiles and settings can restrict other capabilities of the devices, though not all.
Create and edit configuration profiles in Apple Configurator - Apple Support
Profiles are akin to parental controls, but are intended for businesses and organizations.
iOS 18 does provide screen sharing for remote help and support:
Share screens using Messages on iPhone - Apple Support
Request or give remote control in a FaceTime call on iPhone - Apple Support
As for blocking locations and some of the rest, maybe discuss that with the attorney that handled the divorce?
kids in ex's family share and I have no access or control DIVORCE
