Family sharing but asking my kids to verify payment.

I had to update my payment because I got a new card. Since then, my children have not been able to make app purchases. Usually they ask for permission and I verify it and go through the approval process on my end. Now when the kids ask and I approve, it sends a message to my kids saying I approved it, but then asks to verify payment. The best part of all this is that I have been charged for everything, but the apps have not actually downloaded. So, I'm out $25 and after an hour and a half of working on it, and scouring these answers on this community, and nothing. I have deleted all the payments and reinstalled them. Once I did that, apple disabled my purchasing ability and I had to have it enabled again. It is now enabled. I had to reset family sharing for purchases, it sent invites to my kids and I double checked everything. We did a test app of $.99 because I didn't want to be screwed out of more money and still it asks for verification. When I click on verification, it takes me to my home address and that is it. I cannot change anything or verify anything. This is infuriating.