Frustrations with trying to approve child purchases

This is my X (forgotten how many posts I’ve gone through, forgot how many times I’ve tried, forgotten how many times I’ve tried to get into iMessage to find no approval message).

As a non user of iMessage, I am using this purely because I am forced to use this method to approve my child’s purchases. Frankly, I don’t know why because I have to input my code in there to make any purchases anyway and I am happy for any purchases to be made on my kid’s ipad, by my kid because it is always me doing it. However, I am forced to go through a frustrating process of trying to approve my purchases with iMessage which worked for a time (read from another post which is now closed) and basically, my kid’s ipad is unable to install anything new (after another frustrating incident involving resetting both her and my own iPad, also on this child thingie). Frankly, this is the last Apple device left (I have long switched to Android) and this is my last attempt to try and salvage using the Apple ecosystem before moving away 100%.

Why is it so frustrating to use Apple features? It used to be idiot proof (and I am no IT idiot) and these experiences have really made me wonder, what is Apple doing? (Please don’t suggest I switch to iMessage as my “default” messaging app because I won’t but am yet forced to because of this issue).

i really like how I can check usage by my kid using the iPad but I am wondering whether it is worth me tearing up my hair, reading posts of people having the same problems, having workarounds, having those workaround no longer working, repeat ad nauseum.