There are TWO different settings that need to be adjusted for this:
- Accessibility > Pointer Control > Trackpad Options > Turn ON "Use trackpad for dragging" and set "Dragging Style" to Without Drag Lock.
- Trackpad > Point & Click (you land here by default) > Turn OFF "Force Click and haptic feedback"
I had to do BOTH of these things for the drag-and-drop functionality to return to normal, where a regular/hard press selects the item and you continue holding down to drag it to where you want.
(If you want to not have to hold it down while you drag, check out the other options under the "Dragging Style" options in Accessibility settings above.)