Why cant i send messages with the new macOS Ventura update? saying imessage is enabled and i caant find the app in settings to enable it?

If you press and hold command + spacebar to open Spotlight Search, then type, messenger, it will find it and you can run it. While it is open, right click its icon in the dock and choose Options, Keep in Dock. Then you'll have it there whenever you like.

MY MAcbook pro wont send messages

The app is Messages. The messaging service is iMessages. You can sign into iMessages from the Messsages Settings.

That was the best I could surmise from your question.

Missing the point