How to default to more space scaled resolution when connecting new external monitor

I have a laptop that I routinely connect to different external displays (either projectors or hot desks at work, where I'm sitting at a different desk and connecting a new external monitor frequently). I essentially always want the external display to be at its default resolution, which macOS does reliably. I also want my MacBook display to be scaled to the "More Space" setting.

When I connect to a display I've used before, it remembers my setting. When I connect to a new display, it changes the resolution on the MacBook display to "default". Is there a way to change this default to always use "More Space"?

Setup: MacBook Pro (M1 Pro, 14-inch, 2021), macOS Monterey 12.4. Connecting most often by HDMI, but same issue when I connect to a new display by USB-C, VGA, or even an iPad through Continuity.

This issue is not new to this new laptop; I had the same issue with my previous Intel MacBook Pro.