how do i remove a activation lock off of a iphone xsmax

In order to remove Activation Lock, you have to enter the Apple ID and Apple ID Password you used to set up the device.

If you don't know your Apple ID (it's almost always your email address), you can try this link --> If you forgot your Apple ID - Apple Support

If you forgot your Apple ID Password --> If you forgot your Apple ID password - Apple Support

If neither of these links help, the ONLY way you can get Apple to help you would be for you to provide Apple the original purchase receipt with the serial number of the iPhone, providing you are indeed the rightful original owner. Without that, the phone will remain locked.

Try each one which it might be. If you've forgotten them, check your web browser autofill entries and other records, or use Apple's iForgot service, or contact their Account Security team, or if you're the unit's original owner, click here and submit an unlock request.

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You will need the Apple ID and Password that you used to set up the phone. We cannot help and Apple will not unless you can provide the original receipt clearly showing the serial number. This link might help you remember...

https://iforgot.apple.com/password/verify/appleid

You will either have to recover access to the account, or you will have to provide Apple with proof of purchase for the phone from an authorized retailer.