забыла код-пароль от айфона

If you forgot the passcode on your iPhone, or your iPhone is disabled or unavailable -

Click on the link for instructions on how to reset your passcode without a computer if you have iOS 15.2 or higher.

If you see a iPhone, iPad, or Apple Vision Pro unavailable message or Security Lockout screen - Apple Support

Click on the link for instructions on how to reset your passcode using a computer.

If you forgot your iPhone passcode or your iPhone is disabled - Apple Support

even if you took it to Apple, forgetting passcode results in total loss of iphone data which was not backed up previously or sync'd to a cloud server like icloud.

FWIW the OP was asking if it could be done without losing data. It can't.