How can I update my software

There isn't an iPhone 5 SE.

If you mean an iPhone 5, it's not capable of 11 or above.

If you mean an iPhone 5s, it's not capable of 13 or above.

If you mean a first generation iPhone SE, it's not capable of 16 or above.

If you mean a second generation or newer iPhone SE, update it from a computer or through the Software Update function in Settings.

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Dangee123 Said:

"How can I update my software: I want to update my iPhone 5 se software to 16.6.1"

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Updating an iPhone 5 SE to iOS 16.6.1:

A. You can't.  The iPhone 6 will only install to iOS 12. See here: Update your iPhone or iPad Software if you're Experiencing Issues with Location, Date, and Time - Apple Support. And, for the note, even if you could update, only the latest-compatible iOS version will install.

So, what to Try:

B. Update Using a Computer:

Have a Computer Handy? If so, try using a computer to update. Go here: Update your iPhone Using a Computer - User Tip. If any updates are availabe, they will install, sure enough.

Niel wrote:

There isn't an iPhone 5 SE.

If you mean an iPhone 5, it's not capable of 11 or above.

Likewise for the iPhone 5c.