Hi lgwilk,
For help with the Ask To Buy feature, test the steps below found in the article here: If Ask to Buy isn't working - Apple Support
"Check the Apple ID that you're using for purchases
Make sure that you're signed in to the App Store, iTunes Store, Apple TV app, Apple Music app, or Apple Books using the same Apple ID that you selected for sharing content with your family. Learn how to use your own Apple ID for Family Sharing.
On your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch
In iOS 16 or iPadOS 16 or later:
- Go to Settings > Family.
- Tap your name.
- Make a note of which Apple ID is listed.
- Tap Purchases.
- Tap Apple ID for Purchases and make sure that you're signed in with with the same Apple ID that you use for Family Sharing. If not, tap Share using secondary Apple ID and enter the Apple ID and password for that Apple ID. "
If your settings are correct and the issue remains, reach out to Apple Support directly to have them check your account and further assist.
Contact - Official Apple Support
Contact Apple for support and service - Apple Support
Best.